April 09, 2004

Actuarial Jokes

As a lawyer, I am accustomed to some good lawyer jokes.

But I never knew there were actuarial jokes.


Posted by JohnL at April 9, 2004 11:00 PM

I knew there was a 57.3876% chance that that would happen this year, based on your age, weight, and McNugget/Heineken differential

Posted by: Steve the Llamabutcher at April 11, 2004 09:39 PM

I'm sorry to note this here, but I didn't see an "e-mail me" button on your sidebar. Thought you'd want to know that the boxes on your sidebar are migrating a little to the left on my display (Mac/IE) and are obscuring some of the text in your entries.

Posted by: Attila Girl at April 12, 2004 02:49 AM

Grr. This is one of those CSS issues that I had hoped not to face. The body looks fine in IE6/Win, Opera, and Firefox. The banner looks fine in IE6/Win and Firefox and has a small gap in Opera. Of course, since I don't have access to a Mac, that would be the one platform that it doesn't look correct on!

I'll do some research and maybe some more tweaking tonight. I see from a quick Google that there are CSS issues involving absolutely-positioned elements between IE/Mac and other browsers.

Posted by: John Lanius at April 12, 2004 09:16 AM

I don't exactly know what an actuary is, am hiding from a cat that is seeking to destroy me and desperately in search of a bit of cheese, so don't mind me.

Posted by: Mr Mouse at April 12, 2004 10:50 PM

Hmmm, you leave a hint, and still no cheese.

Posted by: Mr Mouse at April 13, 2004 08:56 PM

Hey, i heard this today ;-)

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed.

The other guy takes out his phone and calls the emergency services.
He gasps: "My friend is dead! What can I do?"

The operator says: "Calm down, I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead."

There is a silence, then a gunshot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says: "OK, now what?"

Posted by: Jokes Page! at September 29, 2004 04:23 AM

A person asks, "What is 1+1?"

An accountant pulls out his financial calculator, punches in "1+1=" and punches in "-1-1" and says "two".

An Actuary says, "What do you want it to be?"

An student majoring in arts says, "Do you want fries with that?"

Posted by: Cyn at December 16, 2004 09:35 PM
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